The Coronacation Diaries, Episode 18

So Happy Together

I've been trying to joke around with this whole mandatory social distancing STAY THE FUCK AT HOME forced "vacation," but today it truly dawned on me: we are all trapped here. Together. Indefinitely.

All this togetherness sounds lovely at first, a throwback to less complicated schedules and more family time. Like Leave it to Beaver, but with more Youtubers and fewer salads made with gelatin. But without access to the hobbies that make us uniquely us and give us a chance to spread our wings alone, we all just end up flapping in each other's faces and fighting over the same resources.

My request to the kids to go outside and walk the dog at 4 in the afternoon was met with whines and disdain. It was too hot. They were too sweaty. They were too hungry. They just got back from outside. They'd do it later.

I gave up.

And then, after dinner, the fight.

"I was going to walk the dog!"

"Well I was going to play fetch with him!"

"But I'm going  to walk the dog!"

At which point there was some chasing and some barking and some tackling and then I see my daughter running down the street, carrying the dog, leash in hand. 

My son stomps in. Doors were slammed. Curses against his sister were muttered. He hates her. He also hates practicing piano. Which he then proceeded to do. Loudly.

Meanwhile, I head out for a walk and to listen to a webinar about AP Exam updates (because I am still working, even when I'm not working). And I am immediately tracked down by my daughter (now with leash attached to dog), who launches into all of the ways her brother gets on her very last nerve ON PURPOSE and how he waited --WAITED-- until SHE wanted to walk the dog before HE decided to play fetch.

It's a little thing, this silly fight. A fight about nothing at all. But when it stretches out to infinity, with no end in sight, daily fights over nothing because there's nothing we can do because everything is cancelled...

As soon as it gets warm enough, I'm going to pitch a tent in the backyard and move in there. Just me and a box of wine and the dog.